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Thursday, November 30, 2006

Odd what makes me worry less

It doesn't make any sense at all but I worry less when doctors address up front some of my risk factors in terms of what's going on with me. I had a good appointment with the medical oncologist today. Always nice when a new doctor makes me feel better. I tend to be a little nervy about meeting any new doctor and am always relieved with it goes well. He started off pretty soon by addressing the fact that I am at a high risk for recurrence. It's odd how that would make me worry less but it did. As I've mentioned here before, I trust my surgical oncologist but sometimes the attempts to reassure me (both him and his NP) back fire. It's not their fault. Most people probably would be reassured but I am weird. I worry less when my doctors address some of the negatives up front with me. This new doctor was very compassionate as well as direct and I think it will help me a great deal to have his input as well as the follow up I already have. He did a thorough physical exam and on the face of it said I seemed fine. He wasn't concerned about the little things on the PET/CT I had done in September. He did say with all the adhesions in the groin that the only way to know there would be with a biopsy but that's pretty much what I knew. He said my lungs sounded fine. He has ordered a bone scan which I've never had as well as an MRI of the brain since it's been 15 months since I had one through my neurologist. I'll see him again in two weeks to discuss everything after they can schedule the scans once they get insurance approval. He doesn't know why the CRP test would be high and he did say that PET/CT is good for macroscopic disease but that none of the scans will show microscopic disease, which I knew. If the bone scan and the MRI are fine, I am going to try once again to move on. By that, I don't mean turn off the little voice completely but know that I've done all I can for now and beyond that I need to be optimistic that my body will keep fighting like it's always done.

1 comment:

Heather said...

Carver,

I'm happy your visit went well. I, too, tend to worry less once I know exactly what's going on. The worry of what they might NOT be telling you is excruciating.

I went through a lot of that this year, both with my surgical onc and then the medical onc I saw in Rochester. Neither of them would tell me exactly how bad my liver was. Once I found out the truth, I was horrified, but able to start dealing with it.

A doctor who is compassionate, yet honest, is a treasure and I'm glad you found him. It DOES allow you to let go a little bit and eases the obsessing, that we all tend to go through from time to time.

Of course, I'm sending good vibes for a totally boring MRI and bone scan!

Heather